“Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it.” -Matthew 16:24-25

A cross is not meant to be a weight, or merely an exercise in holiness.

A cross is for crucifixion, and he that is to bear his cross is to bear it with the intent to die to himself.

It is not meant to weigh down, but to free. It is not meant to enslave, but to liberate.

Why would you only carry your cross to make both your body and soul miserable - your body, because its lingering lusts still twitch in selfishness; your soul, because it cannot obtain the victory of resurrection that comes after crucifixion.

“For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also in the likeness of his resurrection: Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin.” -Romans 6:5-6

You will feel better when you’re dead.

Think not that I speak of physical death, but of a death of your fleshly life, and its accompanying desires. A death of the lusts of the flesh, which make a continual warring against the Spirit.

“For he that is dead is freed from sin.” -Romans 6:7

Rainy Days

Do not let the clouds of yesterday obscure the sunshine of today, nor let the sunshine of today give a false hope of tomorrow. For the rainy days of the soul are brought for nourishment,¹ and the sunshine for health. To dwell in one or the other for all of life is to be in a false balance, and an unjust weight.² I bring both.

You need not pray for rain, (and who could bear to), nor seek sunshine. They will each come as I see fit. For lo, it is not for you to know the times or the seasons…³ Yet, in all things, give thanks - “for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.” -1 Thessalonians 5:18

Oh Beloved, you cannot see how your life will turn out from where you are now. You ought to give thanks in faith and trust Me, regardless. What is a month, a year, a decade of sorrow; or a long detour from what you believe to be My will? Child, you cannot see the forest for the trees. When you come forth from the trial - as a dark forest - you will understand.⁴

In the meantime, do not be discouraged. Do not rebel. Give thanks to your God for His care and His activity in your life. Give thanks for His real-life training that He gives each day. Much more can be accomplished in one day from one of God’s refined instruments than could be produced in a lifetime from a stubborn instrument.⁵

Again, beloved, I say, think not your life wasted, nor your time squandered. For I chasten those that I love.⁶ Let a man only ask this: Do I love God with my whole heart? Do I love others as myself? If a man has this love, he can have God’s grace, no matter where it takes him. He can rest in God’s will, no matter how it breaks him.

1. Ecclesiastes 7:3-4
2. Proverbs 11:1
3. Acts 1:6-7
4. 1 Peter 4:12-13
5. 1 Samuel 15:22-23
6. Revelation 3:19

Have you ever been in a building when a fire alarm goes off? I’m not talking about the tiny little smoke alarms found in houses, I’m talking about fire alarms. They’re quite startling - and loud.

I think fire alarms work in much the same way that God plans to work at the end of this world. Everyone will be sitting at ease, completely unsuspecting, and in one terrible instant, everything will be changed. All hearts will be melted, and every mind will be shocked. No matter what anyone was doing before this moment, it will all be trivial compared to the present astonishment that will take hold on every person’s life.

Anyhow, here is a message I wrote yesterday that follows along this line of thinking:

The Grand Illusion

Dear child, I will ask you one thing: if you have been born again by My Spirit, why don’t you walk in the Spirit? Why do you seek only after your own welfare? Have I not said that you should redeem this short time on earth, and do My will diligently?¹

Beloved, I uncover for you a thing that is hidden to the world: this earth shall one day pass away, and all things in it. And know this also: all works and rewards shall also be tried in this fire, to see if they will last. Not everyone that will say to me, “Lord, Lord” shall be rewarded, but those that have done the will of God.²

You do not see the urgency of this final day because it is coming as a surprise. It is coming as an alarm - a panicked and frightening alarm. A sudden alarm. A fire alarm. And if the owner of a house is vigilant and sober, he will be prepared when the alarm sounds.³ But if he is asleep, or distracted, the alarm will catch him off guard, and he will suffer great loss.

Again I say to you, you do not see the urgency of this alarm, because you do not know when it is coming. But know this assuredly: it is coming. As surely as the sun rises, so too shall this world be judged in the last fire. And where will you be?

Do you not see this impending flame? You do not, because from the beginning of your life up until now you have dwelt at ease. You have not considered that every action will be weighed, every idle word judged. For the good, done according to my will, an eternal and everlasting reward; for the bad, done in your own desires and wantonness, a consuming fire.

“Every man’s work shall be made manifest: for the day shall declare it, because it shall be revealed by fire; and the fire shall try every man’s work of what sort it is. If any man’s work abide which he hath built thereupon, he shall receive a reward. If any man’s work shall be burned, he shall suffer loss: but he himself shall be saved; yet so as by fire.” -1 Corinthians 3:13-15

Dear child, would you not be grieved and shaken up to see your entire house burned to the ground before your very eyes? And how much more frightening do you suppose it will be to see the very fabric of your life - your actions, your thoughts, and your words - being burned up and incinerated in preparation for an everlasting life in heaven?

You do not see the impending flame, because it is coming as a thief in the night.⁴ You dwell at ease, and do not consider the judgment that is to come. You consider not the weight of your actions, nor your ability to exercise your soul to do either good or evil; but also, you do not consider your own inclination to fritter away in vanity. If a mind is a terrible thing to waste, how much worse do you suppose it is to leave your life and soul eternally wasted?

How long must I bear with you? How long before you see that the only thing keeping Me from placing great grace and righteousness into your hands is the vanity and trivialities that your hands are already occupied and busy in carrying?

“So likewise, whosoever he be of you that forsaketh not all that he hath, he cannot be my disciple.” -Luke 14:33

You do not see the urgency of judgment because it is coming in an hour that you know not. Satan, the temporary lord of this world, has blinded your eyes, and caused you to dwell at ease.⁵ “Where is the promise of His coming?” he questions. And that evil one whispers further: “How could life ever be any different than what it has been since the day that you were born? For the sun rises, and sets, and this is all that there is of life. Nothing will ever be any different than this.”⁶

And yet I say unto you, ask the dead what will become of this present life. Ask those whose souls are now in torments, if life could ever be anything more than just a sunrise, and a sunset. Or ask those that have gone to glory, and are now enjoying the beginnings of everlasting life, if their hope in the Savior was in vain?

And yet you are blinded, and faithless. You live as though the only things that matter are the things that you can see and touch.⁷ You do not consider the impending flame that is to try every man’s works. You do not consider the immense wealth that could be stored up for you in everlasting glory, and instead pursue the things of this passing world.

For sin and carnality have blinded you, and prevented you from seeing the fire that is to come. For all you see is the sun rising, and the sun setting, and think that nothing more will ever come; and this is the grand illusion, and it has deceived many. It has been a very expensive error, and has cost mankind much. My will is for you to awaken from your slumber, and dispel this illusion.

Come, you sleepers, and rouse yourself from your drowsiness. Behold the everlasting gold that awaits you. Behold the terror and eternal weight that the actions of your own life possess. And consider: one day the earth shall be clean dissolved, and why should you too suffer loss at this flame?⁸ Turn from vanity, and lay hold on My eternal rewards.

1. Ephesians 5:15-17
2. Matthew 7:21-23
3. Matthew 24:42-44
4. 1 Thessalonians 5:2-3
5. 2 Corinthians 4:3-4
6. 2 Peter 3:3-4
7. Colossians 3:1-4
8. Isaiah 24:19-20

Don’t Look Down

Look.
Look at Me.
My child, look to Me.

Look into My eyes, and know this: I am your salvation.¹ I am your healing.

You need not understand all of what is happening, but simply that I am the answer.² Don’t look down to your own ways, but rather, look up to Mine.³ Do not look to your mire, but look to My rainbow. Do not focus on your own faults, but know the power of God. Do not look to the entanglements of sin, but rather the goodness of God.⁴

Beloved, you have crossed from death unto life. You have run off a steep cliff, and you have not fallen. You are afloat on My grace. Don’t look down.

You have run off a steep cliff; and, how can this be!? It is My salvation. Just as Peter walked out onto the water to Jesus,⁵ so too have I called you unto Myself. Don’t look down. Do not see the difficulties below, but the boundless power above.

Look at My countenance. I am your health. I am your purity. I am your strength. You need not sift them out from the hay and stubble of the world. Look unto Me, and you will have peace.⁶

1. Psalm 40:1-3
2. Acts 1:6-8
3. Isaiah 55:8-9
4. Hebrews 12:1-2
5. Matthew 14:28-29
6. Isaiah 26:3-4

“But the LORD hath taken you, and brought you forth out of the iron furnace, even out of Egypt, to be unto him a people of inheritance, as ye are this day.” -Deuteronomy 4:20

The “iron furnace” - this was sort of a nickname given to Egypt, or rather, the type of lifestyle that the Jews of this time were subjected to while living under an oppressive rule in Egypt.

“[T]he children of Israel sighed by reason of the bondage, and they cried, and their cry came up unto God by reason of the bondage.” -Exodus 2:23

Now think on your iron furnace. Each of us live in different areas, and have different lives and circumstances. Yet there is always a constant, no matter who you are: sin. Sin is found in every single human being since Adam.

“For since by man came death, by man came also the resurrection of the dead. For as in Adam all die, even so in Christ shall all be made alive.” -1 Corinthians 15:21-22

The children of Israel were in bondage to physical masters, yet today we are in bondage to the spiritual power called sin. “Whosoever committeth sin is the servant of sin” (John 8:34). Though we sin in our bodies, it is our soul that has become captured by the enemy.

Look once again at your life, an iron furnace, what do you feel?

Surprisingly, you might like it.

If you do not know God, if you have not confessed your sins before His Son Jesus, you are living under the bondage of sin. You are, in a spiritual sense, just like the children of Israel; yet you may not want to change your ways. Remember, God only heard and saved His people when they cried to Him. It was only when they were discontent, and disgusted with their present condition that God looked upon them with mercy. They hated where they were, and knew that there must have been a better life than the one that they were now living.

But being a son of Adam, inheriting the curse of sin, we are simply oriented to enjoy our lives of sin - it is almost second nature to us. Yet this pleasure is only temporary, and in the end will only be swallowed up in pain! Even those who feel no remorse or regret for their selfish actions in this life will one day be judged, and then all of the happiness they once had will be forgotten, and drowned out as they are cast into a lake of fire. There is a much greater life than that of sin - and its rewards are eternal!

Even Moses, who helped free the Israelites from the grips of the Pharaoh, and of the oppression of Egypt, saw the tradeoffs:

“By faith Moses, when he was come to years, refused to be called the son of Pharaoh’s daughter; Choosing rather to suffer affliction with the people of God, than to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a season; Esteeming the reproach of Christ greater riches than the treasures in Egypt: for he had respect unto the recompence of the reward. By faith he forsook Egypt, not fearing the wrath of the king: for he endured, as seeing him who is invisible.” -Hebrews 11:24-27

Will you forsake Egypt? Will you too turn your back to the iron furnace, and reach toward the highest goal?

He who is invisible calls out to you - can’t you hear His gentle plea?

Turn from your old ways, and trust not in your own mind. For I created heaven and earth, and do I not also know the best path for you also? For if you do not know my Son, if you have not called out His name, come to Me.

The path which you are now on is not good, though it be pleasant. For your joys are as the grass, which grows tall one day, and the next is mowed down and cast to the ground. Seek Me, and you shall have an everlasting joy, and an eternal inheritance in My family.

People often ask me how they can have a closer walk with the Lord. It’s really very simple: a little less I, and a little more HIM.

But I wrote something tonight to help express this more fully, which I call: “Count the Cost.” I hope this gives you a little closer walk with Jesus.

Count the Cost

“For which of you, intending to build a tower, sitteth not down first, and counteth the cost, whether he have sufficient to finish it?” -Luke 14:28

Beloved, you seek Me, but you do not always find Me.

You are My child, and yet you do not always know Me as a father.

You are of the household of God, and yet you are sometimes as a foreigner.

Oh! why is it that you seek Me, but that you cannot find Me?

Have I said that I would hide myself from those that I love? No, but rather the contrary: I will reveal Myself to those that I love, and to those that love Me.

And yet, why can you still not find Me? Why do you still fall away? Why do you still wander? What is the meaning of this?

It is because you seek Me casually. You seek me part-time. You seek Me half-heartedly. You seek Me not truly believing that I will be found, nor that I am worthy to be found.

Have you not read: “No man can serve two masters” (Matthew 6:24)? And yet you still cling to your old life. Let there be no confusion: I desire your whole heart. I desire every part of your life.

“I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.” -Galatians 2:20

Beloved, I have so much to give to you. I have so many things to share with you in divine fellowship. It is not out of reach. It is not unobtainable for you.

Have you not counted the cost of this new life? You can believe in Me onto salvation, or you can believe in Me onto salvation and also complete victory and spiritual companionship. It is all a matter of how much you give: your all, or less than your all.

You can believe on Me to avoid hellfire only, but the trying fire will one day burn up everything else beside. Friend, why not believe on Me not only for deliverance from hellfire, but also for an everlasting friend?

You say that you want this new life, but have you truly counted the cost? Do not let Satan sideline your thoughts: My life is full-time. It costs everything. I was serious when I said: “thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might” (Deuteronomy 6:5).

Beloved, this was not meant to be a love of spoken words and prayers! It is a love of actions and of doings.

“If ye love me, keep my commandments.” -John 14:15

“My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth.” -1 John 3:18

Do not let the comfort and familiarity of this world fool or deceive you: I desire your full devotion. The world is set at complete and polar opposite to My kingdom. The world is satisfied with half-heartedness, I am not. The devil is happy with your neutrality and indecision, yet it grieves Me. Love the good, and hate the bad. Cling to Me, and forsake the way of wickedness.

Beloved, you cannot find Me simply by desiring Me. You must count the cost, and be prepared to pay it. You desire Me, and you do well, but how shall I then bless you when your hands are full of garbage? How shall I give you a glass of water when the cup is filled with your own vomit?

Will you be quenched and satisfied simply by holding out your glass for Me to fill? Beloved, count the cost, and empty from your life the things which offend. Take from your heart the things which defile. Make clean the cup, and count the cost, and then you shall truly receive the blessing that I long to pour out to you.

I thought I would include this writing for any of those visitors on my website that may be soul-searching. I hope it will help illustrate the need for salvation in someone’s heart.

And if you are searching, searching, searching for answers, they may be closer than you think, if you can bear it. It’s just that Satan, the temporary lord of this world, (and of this world only, and not the world to come, nor of heaven), would have you believe the ordinary. He would have to you believe the natural, and the sensual - only those things that you can see, hear, smell, taste, and touch. But for those of you who may be searching for something deeper underneath this seemingly primordial existence, this is for you:

Look Up 

I can feel the heartbeat of this planet, and know that it grows faint. I can see the breathing of this planet, and know that it is labored. I can see the heart of this planet, that it is lonely. I can see the hunger of this world, that it is desperate.

Oh you people of the earth! You citizens of this fleeting world! Look up! Look to heaven above! Is not the heavens higher than the earth? All of creation looks upward to the One who has made both heaven and earth. The grasses of the field do mourn and long for the Savior. The birds fly nearer, but reach still higher heaven-ward for the Messiah. The trees stretch forth their arms for the Alpha and Omega.

You who are heavy; you who are burdened; you who are weary and lonesome; you who are dumbfounded and confused: Look upward.

There is one, whose name is Jesus Christ. There is one. He alone can revive your broken heart. He alone can repair a shattered world. He alone can redeem a hopelessly lost lamb. He alone can pick up the pieces and bring light to the darkness.

Look up, turn your heart heaven-ward, and call upon this name: Jesus Christ.

For those interested in reading my own testimony, you can find it here.

I was looking over something I had written about 3 years ago, and it reminded me of all the New Year’s resolutions we make, and how they all seem to inevitably be broken. Anyhow, perhaps this will be of some encouragement around this time of year.

Beloved, it is not unusual to do great things. It is not an out-of-the-ordinary occurrence to do the extraordinary. I am God. I AM extraordinary. I am super-natural. Beloved, it is not unusual to be very fruitful. It is not unusual to do great works in My name.

But, do you know the state of your soul? Have you truly lived and walked in the spirit? Until now, you have lived in My Spirit as virtually comatose. A slight movement here or there, but where is My promised life? Where are My words fulfilled and My love manifested in your life? Am I a liar? Were My words of no effect or power? Forbid the thought.

Live, and you shall prosper. Be awakened from your soul’s slumber. Let Me satisfy you, and you shall have abundance. Is it any wonder you have been unfruitful? Why do you fret over your work when it is your life that is troubled? Why do you fret over your calling when it is your heart that is calling.

I dwell within your heart, and my light shines, and calls out to you…

Beloved, will you feign strength? Give Me your weak heart, and I will quicken you. Will you feign wisdom and intellect? Give Me your ways and your goings, and I will change you and make you holy.

Beloved, why do you lie to both yourself, and God also? Why do you say that you are good enough? That you will just try harder? That you will do better next time? That you will just focus more keenly, or pray more fervently?

Without Me, what is in you? Without Me to uphold your hands, where is your strength? Have I not said ”the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak…” With Me, strength is not unusual. With Me, love is natural. With Me, wisdom flows as a river.

Come with a willing heart. Come honestly. Why will you fill your mouth and defile your tongue with lies? Are you strong enough? Good enough? Can you do it? Be honest, and I will help you. I will bless you. Why try to produce something that is not within yourself?

If you live life according to My word, nothing shall be impossible to you. Why do you look to your living, and not to your life itself. Why look on what you could do when you cannot be? Seek Me first. When you have My life, when you are perfectly abiding in My vine, fruit is natural.

*This was originally sent out to the mailing list on 10/15/07*

I hesitated to share this one for a bit, but decided it was too good to keep back. Obviously from the title, it has a pretty modern tone. I just kept thinking of how the Sword of the Spirit, (from biblical times), so closely resembles our more modern weapon - the gun.

So there you have it: the Gun of the Lord, which is the Word of God…

The Gun of the Lord

“Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God: ” -Ephesians 6:16-17

See here, I have given you a weapon, and it is a weapon indeed. A weapon gives power. Shall an unarmed man go against a man with a gun - and succeed? If the one who is armed is at all skillful, there shall not be able to stand before him even a man of the strongest of might.

In the game Paper-Rock-Scissors, the paper beats the rock, the rock beats the scissors, and scissors beats the paper. Yet My Word always wins - I am the fourth choice. Beloved, think not that I am contained to your earthly limitations. I beat the paper, I beat the rock, and I beat the scissors. I am the trump card. No one bests Me. No one can beat Me. They are as hands before bullets.

Yet beloved, could not a weapon also be used to deter the enemy? Would not its mere presence many times be enough to stop Satan? A weapon is offensive, though it may be used defensively. It is meant to do damage.

The shield of faith is defensive, and it is used only defensively. If the enemy attacks, and is thwarted by this shield, what does it matter to him? He has invested no part of himself in the attack, except a fiery dart from afar. You were protected, but he can most easily try again.

Yet if he attacks, and you are armed with the Word of God, an offensive weapon, he will be slain if he attacks you directly. The enemy cannot stand before this power. If he tries, he will lose every time. But will a shield stop a lion? When the enemy advances with his own self, it is there that the greatest victory may be won. It is the difference between mere survival, and triumphant victory.

Where the word of a King is, there is power. Trust in My words. Take them, shallow them and eat them, and make them your own. Trust in My power. Confide in Me. Lean on me. Trust in the authority of My words; one day the world shall be overcome by them. They are heavy ballistics, and the enemy does not take them lightly.

“And he was clothed with a vesture dipped in blood: and his name is called The Word of God. And the armies which were in heaven followed him upon white horses, clothed in fine linen, white and clean. And out of his mouth goeth a sharp sword, that with it he should smite the nations: and he shall rule them with a rod of iron: and he treadeth the winepress of the fierceness and wrath of Almighty God.” Revelation 19:13-15

What did the serpent do with Eve’s weapon? What immediately did he do? “[H]e said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden? ” (Genesis 3:1). He said, “drop your weapon, and we can talk.” The enemy cannot operate comfortably when there is such power present. It is only once you have abandoned My provision that he begins to work. He cannot negotiate with an armed soldier. Beloved, you are not to negotiate with the enemy on any terms.

Child, you need the protection of My Word: it is your only weapon to launch an offensive, but it is also your best defensive deterrent. I can speak swords and spit bullets, why would you use your hands? The enemy can crush your hands. He is strong, but not armed.

Do not wander from My will. Where My will is, there is My grace also to sustain you. My will is where My words go, and where My Spirit leads. If you do not walk in My words, you walk unarmed; you walk without the fullness of My grace. Without the fullness of My grace is frustration, and danger; with it is peace and safety.

*This was originally sent out to the mailing list on 8/30/07*

Hey, it’s been raining a lot around here lately! Anyhow, I wrote something today, almost out of a whole bunch of seemingly random thoughts I had throughout the day. It was interesting how it all came together.

I hope that God uses this message to reach whoever it is that He is trying to reach today.

Rainy Days

Do not let the clouds of yesterday obscure the sunshine of today, nor let the sunshine of today give a false hope of tomorrow. For the rainy days of the soul are brought for nourishment, and the sunshine for health. To dwell in one or the other for all of life is to be in a false balance, and an unjust weight. I bring both.

You need not pray for rain, (and who could bear to), nor seek sunshine. They will each come as I see fit. For lo, it is not for you to know the times or the seasons… Yet, in all things, give thanks - “for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.” -1 Thessalonians 5:18

Oh Beloved, you cannot see how your life will turn out from where you are now. You ought to give thanks in faith and trust Me, regardless. What is a month, a year, a decade of sorrow; or a long detour from what you believe to be My will? Child, you cannot see the forest for the trees. When you come forth from the trial - as a dark forest - you will understand.

In the meantime, do not be discouraged. Do not rebel. Give thanks to your God for His care and His activity in your life. Give thanks for His real-life training that He gives each day. Much more can be accomplished in one day from one of God’s refined instruments than could be produced in a lifetime from a stubborn instrument.

Again, beloved, I say, think not your life wasted, nor your time squandered. For I chasten those that I love. Let a man only ask this: Do I love God with my whole heart? Do I love others as myself? If a man has this love, he can have God’s grace, no matter where it takes him. He can rest in God’s will, no matter how it breaks him.